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…and falling flat

New week, new job? Or new week, same old mess? Just in case you’re one of the lucky ones, let’s talk about onboarding. Or more specifically, the lack of it.

You’ve probably heard every interviewer ask for someone who can “hit the ground running.” I love to think that it would be ME. That’s often code for: “We have no onboarding plan. We’re too busy to train you. Please already know everything, thanks.”

It’s a lazy way of hiring. It assumes the ideal candidate is a mind reader with insider knowledge of your internal tools, processes, power dynamics, and unspoken expectations.

I’ve been there. They were thrilled to hire me, excited about the “impact I could have.” Gave me a shiny MacBook (yasssss) and then... what? No goals, no buddies, no context. Just me, a brand new email address, and a vague hope I’d figure it out.

By day 7, you’ve read all the internal docs twice, and you’re a lost Sims character staring at a blank screen. But no one has time to onboard you. And aren’t you supposed to know what you’re doing? Sure. I know how to do my job. But what are your expectations? What does success look like here? In 30 days? In 90?

So what do you do when you’re on your own? You set your own direction.

Define what you want to achieve, schedule 1:1s with key people (even if no one tells you to), ask annoying questions, create your own learning plan, and build your own path.

And yeah, sometimes that plan might be “learn enough to leave.” If the vibe is off, the red flags are flying, and you're getting nothing but confusion and silence... maybe your self-onboarding ends with you walking straight into a better opportunity.

Mara, just saying 🤷🏻‍♀️

Find me on Instagram as @amarenabandivan

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